One infant grows up and becomes a jockey Another plays basketball or hockey This one the prize ring hates to enter That one becomes a tackle or center I am just glad as glad can be That I am not them, that they are not me
With all my heart I do admire Athletes who sweat for fun or hire Who take the field in gaudy pomp And maim each other as they romp
My limp and bashful spirit feeds On other people's heroic deeds Now A runs ninety yards to score B knocks the champion to the floor
C risking vertebrae and spines Lashes his steed across the line You'd think my ego it would please To swap positions with one of these
Well, ego it might be pleased enoughBut zealous athletes play so roughThey do not ever in their dealingsConsider one another's feelings
I'm glad that when my struggle begins'Twixt prudence and ego, prudence wins
When swollen eye meets gnarled firstWhen snaps the knee, and cracks the wristWhen officialdom demandsIs there a doctor in the stands?My soul in true thanksgiving speaksFor this modest of physiques
‘Athletes, I'll drink to you,Or eat with youOr anything except compete with youBuy tickets worth their radiumTo watch you gamble in the stadium
And reassure myself anewThat you are not me and I'm not you’. Ogden Nash
'twixt in between; neither one nor the other
prudence to act with regard for one's own interests
radium a radioactive chemical
Poem sourced from:Mahoney, B. (2009). Poetry Reloaded. Melbourne, VIC: Cambridge University Press
Confessions of a Born Spectator
Biography Ogden Nash
One infant grows up and becomes a jockey
Another plays basketball or hockey
This one the prize ring hates to enter
That one becomes a tackle or center
I am just glad as glad can be
That I am not them, that they are not me
With all my heart I do admire
Athletes who sweat for fun or hire
Who take the field in gaudy pomp
And maim each other as they romp
My limp and bashful spirit feeds
On other people's heroic deeds
Now A runs ninety yards to score
B knocks the champion to the floor
C risking vertebrae and spines
Lashes his steed across the line
You'd think my ego it would please
To swap positions with one of these
Well, ego it might be pleased enoughBut zealous athletes play so roughThey do not ever in their dealingsConsider one another's feelings
I'm glad that when my struggle begins'Twixt prudence and ego, prudence wins
When swollen eye meets gnarled firstWhen snaps the knee, and cracks the wristWhen officialdom demandsIs there a doctor in the stands?My soul in true thanksgiving speaksFor this modest of physiques
‘Athletes, I'll drink to you,Or eat with youOr anything except compete with youBuy tickets worth their radiumTo watch you gamble in the stadium
And reassure myself anewThat you are not me and I'm not you’.
Ogden Nash
in between;
neither one
nor the other
to act with
regard for
one's own
interests
a radioactive
chemical
Poem sourced from: Mahoney, B. (2009). Poetry Reloaded. Melbourne, VIC: Cambridge University Press
Photo sourced from: http://media.lonelyplanet.com/lpimg/28635/28635-13/preview.jpg